Happy masturbation may my babes! I love Masturbation May because it is one month where we can do a solid deep dive into our own pleasure. When we experience, explore, and are confident in our own pleasure, it will reflect on all parts of our lives. If we can touch ourselves confidently, we can do anything confidently. While masturbation may is not the only time to masturbate, let it be a time of sacred sexuality where your pleasure comes first and then you can translate it to the rest of the year. 


Is masturbation beneficial for health? 

Masturbation is beneficial in health for many reasons. For starters it's an absolutely wonderful way to explore your body and get familiar with yourself. This has been extremely healthy for people that may have shame around their body, don't know how to explore their pleasure, or have trauma with their body. It's also beneficial in the sense that it's a known stress reliever, helps you sleep better, and benefits your happy hormones like endorphins. 


Do you have a “masturbation routine”? 

I totally have a masturbation routine! I definitely value getting fully relaxed when trying to masturbate, since it ensures that my pleasure can flow and not feel so forced. I would really recommend being in an environment where you feel comfortable and you have plenty of alone time. Try to put on your favorite music and put on things that comfort you such as candles, lingerie, chocolate, maybe a glass of wine. Then when you're feeling relaxed you can either use your own hands or use toys like velvet Thruster to start exploring your pleasure. When you create a masturbation routine like this, it prepares your mind and body to be able to relax and receive the pleasure you desire. 


I struggle to reach orgasm, even when masturbating.

This is totally normal! When we struggle to reach orgasm even through masturbation, a couple things to ask are the following.  


Am I fully relaxed?  


Am I doing the right techniques?  


Am I in a part of my life where something could be affecting my pleasure such as diet, rest, medication, or stress?  


If you answered yes to any of these, it's time to take a deep dive and see what you can do to improve it. If you're not fully relaxed, see how you can build a masturbation routine that would help you relax. If you're unsure about the technique, make a list of three through five different things you can try such as different techniques or sex toys. If the factor might be something like medication or stress, see if you can talk to a professional or what lifestyle changes you can make that could benefit your pleasure. 


How do I tell my partner I want to try mutual masturbation? 

Welcome to the exciting world of mutual masturbation! It can definitely be a little daunting to ask our partners to do something new sexually with us. I always like to bring up something sexual that I desire in a very calm and non-sexual setting.  


So you're having coffee on the couch and simply having a conversation, you can lightly bring up that you would like to try something new together. Explain how you've been having an incredible time in your sex life thus far, and you'd like to expand on it. You can explain a couple of reasons as to why you would like to try mutual masturbation, what about it excites you, and what you're hoping to get out of it.  


Are you hoping to get more stimulation? Are you hoping to see how your partner touches themselves? Are you hoping to have more discovery and intimacy together?  


Put these all in your conversation. But remember above all, even if a conversation seems daunting or difficult, the best way to have one is to be upfront and honest. It will always get your point across. 


Can masturbation help reach orgasms easier? 

Masturbation can absolutely help you reach your orgasms easier! The main reason this is is because masturbation gives you the opportunity to explore your own body in your own time.  


Without the pressure of being with someone else or feeling like you need to rush, you can take your time as you feel every part of your body. Starting from the head and working your way down to the toes, I invite you to touch all parts of your body to see what feels good and what might feel more desirable than the other.  


Do you have sensitive spots? Perhaps the nipples and the hips or the inner thighs feel amazing, as well as touching your genitals.  


When you are touching your genitals and masturbating, what strokes feel good? What motions feel good? Are you experimenting with toys, penetration, or any sort of mental stimulation?  


From here you can have a really good basis of what feels amazing to you, and then that could be and we did to your partner. Always remember, the one person that knows how to get you off best is… you!